You can never be alone in the city. Not when you live in a cramped apartment with three roommates who are just as lost as you. Not when everyone around you bears the dreaded consequences that come with adulthood. The city offers temptations with open arms in the form of inappropriate activities that lead to mischief and random vicious coercions. We struggle to acquaint ourselves with our new normalcy. For instance, what once was common and innocent behavior from our prior lives, like greetings or smiles, can be misread by the city as ill inferred intentions. A friend took two sips of her Diet Pepsi and decided she was finished. Rather than toss it, she simply offered the soda to a stranger who just arrived on his bike. He dismounted in rapid fury and berated her intentions. An unsolicited large male ego poked himself into the conversation and began to banter, leading him to inexplicably steal the other man’s bike. I don’t look at the out-of-the-ordinary situations that have been occurring since I’ve moved here as scary, but just as my daily surprises or new spices to add to my life.
I’ve begun attaching band aids for swathed comfort to soothe the large aching blisters around my sore toes. These tormentors are not born from walking through the city, but from sliding my feet into tight platform shoes and dancing till my body could not shake any longer. Each venue carried a familiar essence that improved as the nightly bender continued. Women travel in packs at clubs, and a drunken kiss or an implicit promise, are bound to defend against the packs of prowling predators. The pack travels from club to club until seven in the morning, when there are just three left, two watching one. That is until one decided she would open her legs wide and come home the next day covered in bruises, with deep impressions where his fingers dug in on her thigh. Two left at nine in the morning, one left later at four in the afternoon. A city that never sleeps, the people who never stop moving, where there’s no time for sleep. The later the night goes the more you can’t trust others. Never trust the stranger of the night.
This city is like entering another world, a world that constantly challenges whether you are driven enough. It is a story of Adam and Eve, dazzled with fantasies and drugs. We are constantly tempted to stray away from our north star, our success. And despite it all we are not alone. There will always be that security guard in the lobby to model my outfit, the dog walkers I smile at, confusion over random texts from the previous night, and bumping into my classmates on the streets. I have much to learn, but I do know this: I belong to this city, just like the rats under my feet and the skyscrapers that cast a shadow on me on a hot summer day.
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